In this case the old friend is a beloved lens and the kindness remembered was from my cousin Ken Dudley.
Ken and I were cousins but we were truly like brothers. We grew up together on the adjoining Montana farms of our families and as the years passed we became even closer as I regularly returned to the farm for extended summer visits. He eventually owned and operated the entire spread (a big operation) and it was always like a homecoming when I went back. By 2005 I was flirting with my developing interest in bird photography and Ken loved and nurtured the resident Great Horned Owls that hung around in the old farm buildings so he encouraged my attempts at photographing them but knew that I was frustrated by the limitations of my camera gear. Photographing birds well usually requires a significant investment in equipment and I was a recently retired high school teacher on a limited income.
Long story short – Ken struggled for years with polycystic kidney disease (PKD) and tragically very soon after a successful kidney transplant he passed away from an unrelated cancer in early 2007. We spent a lot of time together during the years he was sick because even though he lived in Montana all of his many treatments and surgeries were here in Salt Lake City so he always stayed with me. Our already very strong bond grew.
Several months after he died I learned that Ken had left me a “gift”. When I received the check from his brother Jim (estate executor) it included the following note:
“Ron, Ken asked me to help him show his appreciation for all your help and support. On his behalf I am sending this gift from his estate. Enjoy. You were his best friend.”
I was floored.
Though I agonized over the decision for months I eventually decided to spend a significant portion of the gift on what I consider to be the ultimate bird and wildlife lens, Canon’s EF 500mm f/4L IS USM. I agonized because I was afraid it might be an impulsive and frivolous decision – that in the end bird photography might be a passing fancy for me. I needn’t have worried…
Here I am in my back yard with my brand new toy (June, 2007) and wearing a silly smirk on my face. One of the fingers on my left hand was dripping blood because I’d pinched it in the tripod (also new) and the grubby T-shirt was a gift from one of my students (as you can see I was too fond of it for much too long). At this point I was wondering just what in the hell I’d done! I had a new, expensive and complex piece of equipment that I had no idea how to use to potential.
I began to pursue my photography with a vengeance and “Ken’s lens” has been a huge factor in whatever success I’ve had for almost 7 years. But last year when Canon came out with the new version of the same lens (EF 500mm f/4L IS II USM) my second “lens seduction” began. I’ve tried to resist it (I really have) but in the end they nailed me. It’s twice the price of the older version but eventually the reduction in weight and other significant improvements won me over so a few weeks ago I made the plunge. I’ve now had the new lens for seven weeks.
Physically the two lenses look very similar (the new version 2 on the left covered with a Lens Coat, version 1 on the right). Obviously I have a lens redundancy issue so I need to sell version 1 but I’ve been procrastinating for a couple of reasons. Before selling the original 500mm I wanted to make sure there were no problems with the new one. There aren’t. Recently I’ve come to the realization that part of the reason for my hesitation is the emotional attachment I have for Ken’s lens but it’s now time to let go.
This is Ken in 1999 on the farm and the tractor that he loved so much (Glacier National Park is about 30 miles out of frame to the right – wish you could see the mountains in this shot).
I suspect that many of my readers know how much Ken’s gift means to me. It changed my life for the better and has given me much joy for seven years. And even with my new lens Ken’s thoughtfulness will keep on giving because I’m sure I’d never have pursued my photography to the extent I have without his gift.
Thank you, Ken!
“Spirit in the Sky”.
Ron
This is such a wonderful story! It is nice to know how you got started with photography. I think Ken would be very pleased with what you’ve done with his gift. (A little aside: what is it about guys named Ron and these huge camera lenses? Another friend named Ron has a seemingly similar huge lens for his camera…)
What a touching story, Ron! I would be in your shoes … unable to let go because of the association and history of the acquisition, and also the “friendship” with the lens. We spend so much time with our gear, I completely understand. I’m amazed by the gift you were given, but I shouldn’t be, considering the nature of your relationship and the kindness of the person you describe here. Being a writer, also a field not known for its exorbitant salaries (lol), I can only imagine what it was like to take that check and invest so much of it in one, gorgeous lens. It must have felt like an anxiety attack in nirvana! I’m so glad you shared this story. It adds a level of depth to everything I already know about your photography. I hope the new glass is everything it is supposed to be and more.
What a lovely tribute Ron!
Thank you, Charlotte.
A wonderful tale on many levels, Ron, well told and a terrific tribute to a lost friend.
I’ve had my 500mm f/4L IS II USM and I predict with certainty you will love the new one as much or more as the old one. Your photos will only get better. Your best tribute to a lost friend is to keep improving the skills he inspired you to develop.
I thought of you when I was considering this purchase, Jim. I went through incredible angst in trying to make the decision but at least I wasn’t changing out my entire system like you did. You must have been tearing hair out!
That says it best
Ron, you open worlds with your heart, your integrity, and your dedication, as well as your spectacular photography. Thank you for sharing the story of your wonderful relationship with your cousin, and how your friendship has gifted us all.
You’re very welcome, Alison. I’m delighted that you enjoyed the post.
Ron–I can understand your feelings for your older camera, not only for how it came to you, but for where it’s brought you. As long as you keep on taking and sharing your wonderful photographs and Interesting , entertaining,informative comments; as long as YOU are enjoying what you do, then you are still appreciating, respecting and being thankful for Ken’s gift…(it’s what you’re doing that was the gift…the camera was only a tool…the means to an end, to a goal). I’m sure it bring him such great pleasure to know you were ready to move up and pass your old camera on to another “appreciator”. Let’s hope the next person you pass that tool onto gets and gives as much pleasure with it as you have; that way it keeps on giving. You honor, respect, and thank Ken every time you get up at 4:30 in the morning, freeze your nose, toes, fingers,and butt off… Or roast and sweat…(hoping for a good , cable-free, light in the eyes “keeper” )—then go home, sort through a ton of images, post them and try to conjure up just the right grabbers and comments, answer questions, then, finally, reply to an international merry mob of happy followers…who keep the gift going by spreading what they’ve learned from you and from each other. Pretty amazing when you think about what one man’s gift to another has and continues to accomplish!!!—.”Way cool!!, as my grand kids say , or “Wicked cool” as they say in Maine…or ” Waste!” (pronounced, Wash-Tay) as they’d say in Wounded Knee….I agree!!!
“every time you get up at 4:30 in the morning, freeze your nose, toes, fingers,and butt off… Or roast and sweat…(hoping for a good , cable-free, light in the eyes “keeper””…
That made me smile, Patty. You’ve got my life pegged! I wouldn’t have it any other way, though. Thank you very much for the nice sentiments!
Great story even though it started off a little sad. When my Mom died and left me some money I went out and splurged on a new car and always thought “My Mom would love this car.” I enjoy seeing your pictures. They motivate me to get out and shoot.
“I enjoy seeing your pictures. They motivate me to get out and shoot.”
Good, Dina – glad to hear that!
Ditto Patti and Nancy although I could never have expressed either sentiment as eloquently as they did.
Dave
I agree about the comments of Patty and Nancy, Dave. Thank you.
Saying goodbye to your old lens and welcoming your new one is sure to open up new doors for you, as hard as that was for you. What a touching back story. I think part of the reason your photography appeals to me (besides the fact that you photograph our feathered friends) are the personal touches to each and every story behind all your photographs. Well done, Ron!
Kathryn, I enjoyed hearing your feedback about “personal touches”. I struggled with this post for fear I was being TOO personal.
It’s a bloody amazing lens!! I wish there was a “thumbs up” tag, so I could agree with all of the above. Silly Facebook! It’s a very lucky thing to have such a good friend, and a relative to boot!!
“It’s a very lucky thing to have such a good friend, and a relative to boot!!”
Exactly, Nicole. That was a combination that I enjoyed very much in Ken. Our fathers (brothers) had a very similar relationship.
It seems the pebble analogy is widespread.Like its ripples.Those ripples will lap my shoreline a long time, too.
If an analogy works, it works, Diane. Thank you.
What a wonderful relationship you and Ken had! Thanks to Ken’s thoughtfulness and generosity, the world has been able to share your tremendous talent!
It’s a relationship I still miss, Wally. Thank you.
Thank you, what a lovely post…its nice to hear some of the backstory!
Thank you, aka Blue.
Dear Ken,
You probably had no idea how many lives you were going to be touching (in the most positive way!) when your gift to Ron made his incredible talent for bird photography possible for him, and for all of us who benefit from his amazing images and comments on behaviors, to enjoy, learn from and share, and to develop friendships continents apart.. Your single act is HUGE! You rewarded a very special friend for doing what he was privileged to be able to do, with and for you…and, as a result, you have enriched, not only Ron’s life, but the lives of probably hundreds…in many parts of the world! Through your act of love and appreciation, Ron has met, and become friends with and mutual admirers of people like Mia and Jerry Liguori…and so many others whose education, experience and training have added to his knowledge…and ours. It’s a tired old cliche, but fits: “You were the pebble in a most amazing pool”…the “pool”, in this case, is actually several oceans. Your gift has made this world smaller and better. Thank You!!! (not bad for a farmer from Montana,)…
Thanks so much for the touching tribute to Ken, Patty.
Thank you Patty. You have nailed what I was feeling as I read this post. I am only sorry that Ken didn’t realise the oceans that his gift would travel to enrich/beautify/educate so many of us.
And I hope that Ron realises what a gift he is. And I smiled at the wearing a t-shirt to death and beyond. I do it too.
Thanks, Elephant’s Child. And I’m delighted to hear that you enjoyed that old ratty T-shirt. I’m known for them when I’m working in the yard…
This is a lovely post. Thanks for the back story Ron.
Thank you, aka Blue.
I’m sure Ken would be pleased to know all that you have done with his gift.
Thank you, Bruce. I think he would be…
What a great story, very touching. And your faithful readers and admirers can indeed agree with you that you put your purchase to excellent use! I look forward to all the great photos with the new lens.
I hope the new glass serves me as well as the old one did, Pierre. Thanks.
Great story, great shots, many thanks for sharing. The spirit of a true friend gone stays with you forever!!
Hope you can still go to the farm.
Dick, Yes I still go to the farm. Ken’s brother and sisters still own much of it and I’m very close to them also.
I think its easy to find symbols in our life….something that we decide represents our feelings… a building, a home, or even “Dad’s favorite wrench”. I think its harder to “hold” something we can’t touch, that’s deep within our hearts, harder to give it the credit it deserves. In physics, its the “law of conservation of energy” which states that energy can be neither created nor destroyed, it only changes form…..the feelings you have, for an object that is only a symbol, has done its job, the real engergy lives on and will never be lost.
Tim
Beautifully put, Tim. Thanks so much.
Thank you Ron for sharing. And because of your friend’s gift, you’ve been able to share your gifts with all of us . So again, I thank you .
Very nice thought, John – spreading the joy!
Ron, thank you for sharing this story. I had no idea of the connection between the start of your photography talent and Ken’s gift. I agree with Nancy. The story continues with the new lens and the next lens. They are all because of Ken.
Thank you, Shawna. I thought you knew…
Nice story Ron. You and Ken had a special friendship. The way I see it is Version 2 is just an extension of Version1. Ken’s gift of true friendship just keeps giving!
Well said, Nancy. Thank you.